How Not To Be A Supermodel

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It’s the second you’ve all been ready for*: my first ever ebook, How Not To Be A Supermodel, is out there for pre-order! Here!

An precise ebook that it is possible for you to to carry in your arms. Or, if you happen to desire my dulcet tones, take heed to together with your ears. You’ve beloved my revealing life updates, over time, and also you’ve diligently learn by way of my farcical tales of woe (bear in mind after I nearly by chance penetrated myself with a shower faucet?): now it’s time to let me take you all the best way again to 2001, after I was a mere slip of a factor, leaving my legislation diploma to grow to be an immediately wealthy and well-known supermodel.

You possibly can name How Not To Be A Supermodel a memoir, as a result of I wrote it about myself and my reminiscences and the experiences I had as a trend mannequin within the noughties, however my God that makes it sound very critical. “Memoir” makes it sound as if I wrote my ebook within the 1800s. Within the drawing room, while mom did her needlepoint and Eliza practised on the pianoforte.

And let me ask you this: would a memoir, to your thoughts, embrace a narrative about by chance occurring a luxurious five-day vacation with a person you didn’t know? Would a memoir sometimes have a chapter referred to as Physique Like a Turgid Penis? Or – maintain on a second whereas I rustle by way of my notes – I’m Drunk and I’m Not Sporting Knickers? No it will not.

So sure, I wrote it about me and sure, it’s set previously, however don’t make the error of considering that any painful soul-searching went into this ebook. Let’s not get the flawed finish of the stick, right here. I didn’t write it while sobbing periodically right into a starched linen kerchief, dabbing my eyes when it acquired to the insufferable bits: it is a rip-roaring riot of a experience by way of a decade of the unbelievable eventualities and stunning occasions that life as a non-supermodel threw up, and it’s chaotic and blundering and humorous and often ridiculous.

Pre-order How Not To Be A Supermodel

OK, there are poignant moments. In fact there are. In truth I used to be particularly instructed, after I acquired the ebook deal, that I needed to embrace the bits that might create one thing of a speaking level. (As if me inadvertently turning into concerned in an impromptu intercourse present or nearly falling into shark-infested waters wasn’t sufficient of a speaking level.) And so sure, I’ve put within the troublesome bits in addition to the entire elements that may doubtlessly have you ever spitting out your espresso and embarrassing your self on public transport.

However largely it is a snort-inducing, extremely correct** account of all of the methods during which I did not grow to be a supermodel. My obvious bodily shortcomings, my character defects and my spectacular skill to draw chaos and catastrophe in nearly any state of affairs.

You possibly can pre-order How Not To Be A Supermodel now – the discharge date is twenty ninth August. It has already been heralded as THE ONLY BOOK YOU NEED TO READ THIS YEAR!*** and so I believe it’s a reasonably secure guess that you just’ll adore it. Pre-orders actually matter, apparently, and so if you happen to solely ever click on on one hyperlink I publish then please make it this one. I’ll be without end in your debt.

Pre-order your copy of How Not To Be A Supermodel here

I’ll be again with extra posts concerning the ebook and concerning the strategy of writing it as a result of it has truthfully been one of the best, most satisfying factor I’ve ever executed in my grownup life. If you happen to’ve adopted me for some time you then’ll know that writing was what I had began to do on the finish of my modelling profession; running a blog was a really joyful accident that took off into one thing nice and I’ve an excellent and rewarding profession in social media due to it, however I’ve been hounding a ebook deal for a really very long time****. It’s a correct “full circle” second for me.